We have waited over three and a half years for this
milestone, and even so, it is not yet fully complete. When I learned that I was
pregnant with our daughter Joelle at the beginning of July 2012, one of my
initial concerns was, “How can we possibly get Benjamin walking before then?” I
addressed this concern with his physical therapist (P.T.), and she assured me
that this would be our main focus throughout my pregnancy. The issue of walking
became a regular prayer request in our home as well because, naturally speaking,
it looked so unlikely that Benjamin would reach this milestone any time soon. He
was very content to crawl everywhere, and he was still resistant to being held
in a standing position, though he was getting into the habit of pulling to
stand on furniture when it was his idea.
I also had a growing concern about lifting him, especially since I had some
complications with a low-lying placenta arise at the end of my first trimester.
Thankfully, though, that issue resolved itself within the next few months.
In August Benjamin began attending a school program
two mornings a week that is specifically designed for three-year-olds with
developmental delays. It is held at one of the local elementary schools, and
besides classroom activities, he receives on-site therapy with the school’s
physical therapist, speech therapist and occupational therapist. He adjusted
well to the program, and Shawn and I were so relieved that he would be having
added intervention to help him with his development. The weekly in-home therapy
we received through Sooner Start had ended in May when Benjamin turned three. A
month into the school year, though, I realized that he needed more than just
four hours a week of interaction with other children. In the weariness of
pregnancy, I realized that I needed more breaks as well. So, I looked into the
local Head Start child care program and began the process to get him enrolled. I
attended Head Start as a child and had a positive experience, so I was
optimistic about taking this route. Shawn and I thought it would be very good
for our son to be around a larger group of typically-developing children. The
agency was willing to tailor things for Benjamin’s unique situation and allowed
me to sign him up for only two mornings a week. They also assured me that an
aid would be provided for him to assist with his specific care needs. He was
able to start the program near the end of October, and after a rocky first few
days, he got settled in and now loves to go! He shares an aid, who he adores,
with another little girl who has cerebral palsy. She also happens to be a
member of his class at the elementary school. Our son is now receiving
intervention and reinforcement of the things we are working on from multiple
sources!
We continued to work hard in physical therapy. Our
biggest hurdle was figuring out how to teach Benjamin the concept of placing
one foot in front of the other to take steps. He was cruising the furniture
stepping side to side by this point, though he had a tendency to drag one leg
behind the other. One day in therapy his P.T. and I both sat down feeling
perplexed by this issue. After the progress we had been making, it felt like we
had hit another wall that Benjamin was unwilling to scale at this point. We had
tried so many different things to motivate him to take forward steps, all to no
avail. In one final attempt, she had me sit on a stool several feet away and
start encouraging Benjamin to come to me. In that moment, we suddenly had a
breakthrough! Benjamin is still very much a Mommy’s boy, and even though he is
with me most of the time, this became the motivation he needed to move his feet
forward with her assistance. We were both ecstatic as he smiled and laughed and
moved in my direction! In that brief minute, something flipped in his brain,
and Benjamin grasped the concept of stepping forward instead of side-to-side. I
call it Divine intervention!
With this large hurdle behind us, we were now ready
to introduce Benjamin to a child-size walker. His P.T. pulled one out soon
after and had Benjamin practice standing with it while holding the handles. He
wasn’t sure what to think of this new contraption, and, as usual, he was
resistant to the change. However, it didn’t take long before he started to
grasp the concept of how to use the walker to his advantage. Shawn and I were
amazed at how quickly he took to this new-found skill. Before long he had
learned to pick up speed and to re-adjust himself when he bumped into
something. Shawn started taking him on walks around the block, and though it
was often slow-going, Benjamin loved every minute! He was experiencing a new
level of independence, and his strength and stamina were increasing. Meanwhile,
we continued to work on having him walk with our assistance. We practiced at
home almost daily. I would sit on one side of the living room with his favorite
toy (a See-and-Say) in hand and spin it while Shawn supported him at the other
end of the room and helped him move towards me. Bit by bit, he required less
and less support. The main thing was helping him to gain his confidence.
Sometimes our little guy would hold his own hand as he took shaky steps towards
me. Though I’m not sure that it helped him physically, he definitely found a
level of psychological support using that method! I was so relieved that I
could now hold Benjamin’s hands and walk him places, since he had become too
heavy for me to carry around.
Over the Christmas holiday break, Benjamin’s P.T.
encouraged us to take the walker to the mall for practice. It wasn’t until we
got there that I realized we had never had our son use his walker in this large
of a public setting before. Shawn had already considered that fact and was
feeling a little apprehensive. Within moments we were very much aware of all of
the stares from passers-by. Though we didn’t like to admit it, there was a
sting of embarrassment as we realized again that what has been normal for us is
so far from normal to the general public. However, we took things in stride and
encouraged our son along. Meanwhile, Benjamin was having a great time! We were
shocked and thrilled that he was able to go the entire distance around the
mall. We had to laugh inside by the end of the outing. A three-year-old with a
walker is not a sight you see every day, much less a three-year-old who is as
enthusiastic as our little boy behaved. He let out shouts and squeals of
delight the whole way around the mall.
We really couldn’t blame people for looking, and we were so proud of him!
By the beginning of the New Year, it was becoming obvious
that Benjamin’s season with the walker would be a short one. In fact, we just
retired it for good on February 3! The month prior, on January 8, there was
much rejoicing when my little boy took independent steps towards me during his
physical therapy appointment! Shawn was thrilled to hear the news, and we were
able to get him to take some more independent steps during our practice times
at home over the next week. January 14 was another magical day for us. When I
picked up my son from Head Start, his teacher told me that he had taken 6-7
steps on his own initiative! I couldn’t wait to tell Shawn when he got home!
Benjamin and I were playing with a toy in end of the living room closest to the
front door when my husband walked in. I immediately told him the good news and
then stood Benjamin up and encouraged him, “Walk to Daddy!” With a huge grin on
his face, our little boy took 7-8 steps all by himself into his Daddy’s waiting
arms. It was the first time he had ever walked to Shawn before. A very proud
father enthusiastically exclaimed, “Yay! You walked to Daddy!” Then with tears
in his eyes he repeated, “You walked to Daddy.” I started to cry too. There are
no words to express the joy and gratitude that rose up in both of our hearts at
that moment. We had waited and waited and waited for this, and it was
overwhelming and a bit surreal that it was finally happening.
That was less than a month ago, and our little champ
continues to make progress. He’s still not walking independently on a regular
basis, but we know it won’t be long. As we eagerly anticipate the arrival of
our beautiful daughter at the end of this month, I am filled with gratitude as
I look back and consider how far Benjamin has come over these last several
months. What felt so impossible has become a reality. Our prayers have been
answered, and all the hard work has paid off as we keep taking things step by
step!
Coming out of a therapy session.
Wearing his special Theratogs that help support his low muscle tone and his orthodic braces that give him ankle support.
